I'm a real SELFISH BITCH.

No excuses. No apologies.

Because damn - I EARNED this!

Through all those years of questioning my decisions and wondering how my actions would impact others... and always holding back so I didn't diminish anyone else's flame.

Knocking at the door of 50 is liberating.

Wearing my MIDDLE-AGED CLOAK OF INVISIBILITY has truly allowed me to step in to who I REALLY am... and not find myself scurrying around, trying to fit in with the acceptable face of motherhood, womanhood and online business.

Because truth is? I love my kids - of COURSE! But can I have a HELL YEH! for them being at school? or sleeping...

Because I LOVE satisfying ME!

Doing stuff for ME!

Nobody else.

Shaping my life to fit ME!

I want to write. I want to create. I want to build. 

And these things take time. Time that many would think would be selfish NOT to spend on your family.

There have been MANY times where I've much preferred to stick on a pair of noise-cancelling headphones and fire up the keyboard rather than sit through a mediocre film I didn't choose anyway... 

And apparently that makes me selfish.

Is it REALLY selfish though to be following your own dream? To be living the life you CHOOSE to be living? To spend your days doing the things which make you HAPPY? The things which FUEL your SOUL and give you JOY? 

Why is it that women are supposed to be compliant? Nice? "Be Kind"

I think we all know the stereotype of successful men being driven, focused and applying single-minded selfishness to building their empires - but when women do it? It's seen as a failing of your sex.

You're not doing "womanhood" properly.

FUCK THAT SHIT.

I LIVE for building my business.

The THRILL of getting a payment notification from making an online sale will NEVER diminish.

There is NOTHING quite like earning money from selling your KNOWLEDGE and knowing that people are buying in to YOU and how you can help them.

But yeh... SELFISH.

Selfish for wanting to write. Selfish for wanting to share my message. Selfish for wanting my kids to just STFU a moment when I'm trying to think.

I don't believe in multi-tasking - I mean the closest I come to that is listening to an audiobook when half-heartedly running a duster around - or driving in to town listening to a podcast.

When I'm in the ZONE - I am IN THE FUCKING ZONE! There's no messing - I am FOCUSED - and I LOVE that! 

It makes me excited, it gives me energy and it makes every fibre in my brain tingle with delight.

One woman's pure enjoyment is another woman's pure selfishness. 

But I'm not ashamed to be called selfish. I LOVE the fact I'm lucky (lucky??? I chose this shit!) to be doing EXACTLY what I want and loving every minute of it because it's about ME being ME and getting to SHARE all the stuff I know.

Choose your selfish.

You can either be selfish be doing stuff FOR YOU - or you can be selfish by NOT doing what you are CALLED TO DO.

Which one do you want to be?